Showing posts with label grateful. Show all posts
Showing posts with label grateful. Show all posts

Wednesday

Ego and Mindfulness, by Corrado Pensa

Standing Buddha Sri Lanka. Photo © Hazel WaghornI would like to consider the words of Buddhadhassa Bhikkhu when he said that many people suffer mental disorders, but a much more common disease is a spiritual disease which goes by the name of ‘me’ or ‘mine’. Most of us, it seems, need to work to be healed from this illness.
What is it, then, that we usually refer to in this way? What is it that we call ‘ego’, ‘me’, or ‘mine’? Ego is the totality of what is classically called ‘afflictions’, the afflictions being attachment, aversion, and ignorance; ego is our deep habit for attachment, aversion and ignorance. In other words, ego is being attached to attachment, being attached to aversion, being attached to ignorance. Unless we taste real peace, we tend to be attached to desire. We see desire as having a value in itself, something energetic, as something which can for a while take us from our boredom and depression, etc.
Unless we taste some inner stability which gives us a little more clarity and perspective, we are easily attached to our several forms of aversion. We think we don’t care about the many resentments we have against other people, or against ourselves, and then we go into retreat and start seeing a mass of aversion. The most important thing we begin to see, however, is not the aversion itself, but that we are holding onto it as though it were a treasure and we are afraid of letting this treasure go; we are afraid that if we lose this important thing, if we start letting go of this resentment or aversion, then we shall lose our identity.
Sometimes when we hear the words ‘let go’ we think that means letting go of something fascinating. That is true to a certain extent, but much of what is meant by ‘letting go’ is related to what is painful. Out of a deep habit, we are attached to many forms of aversion, which is to say, we are attached to many forms of suffering, and we hold onto them. We are also attached to ignorance. We may know, for example, that being recollected, being mindful, is a good thing; we know we have never regretted being mindful, and yet we choose to drift along with a total lack of mindfulness. Isn’t that attachment to ignorance? Isn’t that yielding to the momentum of unawareness and to its power and strength?
We tend to conceive of ego, not as a necessary convention, but as a solid entity which is separate, which has an intrinsic existence independent of anything else. We also impute this same solidity and separateness onto everything else, onto people and events. Ego, then, is conceived as something solid, but ego is also the activity of incessantly solidifying events, people, and everything. We could say that ego is a radical denial of our belonging to a vast, flowing interconnectedness. We may be able to accept the idea, but as long as ego is strong and rampant, we are stopped, we are prevented from drinking into this flowing interconnection, because we experience ourselves as being separate, solid and basically alone in this vast world. We experience ourselves as anything but interconnectedness, anything but flowing processes.
Temple Building. Photo: © Paul HeatleyIf we consider envy, we can easily see how ego (the me/mine) comes into being. On the other hand, if we had real participation in this flowing, universal interconnection, the fact that our friend John has had some success or good fortune would obviously, naturally, be something positive for us as well. There would not be any other option, any other possibility. Mudita (sympathetic joy) would be present; it would not be the object of an arduous practice, but would already be there as our nature, as the most logical and natural thing. We know how things go, however. There is usually me on this side, this one thing here, and another thing on the other side, our friend John—and also a third piece, the good fortune, which adds up to John’s dimension—so he is big and we are small; he is rich and we are poor. So we have aversion for him, aversion for ourselves, and attachment to that thing called ‘good fortune’. This is envy; this is suffering; this is the state of separation; this is ego; it is the deeply unnatural situation of our life, our suffering.
When Zen master Bankei died, an old blind man who used to sit outside the zendo said how sad he was. ‘You see,’ said the blind man, ‘since I am blind I cannot watch people’s faces, so I judge their character by the sound of their voices. And it is this way... 
Full story at Buddhism Now

Effie's Psych
Twitter,
Blogger,
and Tumblr.
-->

Monday

A Mindful Reflection

Positive psychology reflection by: ahundredyears
"I was the recipient of a random act of kindness tonight.
As I was grocery shopping, a man came up to me and offered me a $10 off coupon that his wife had saved, but couldn’t use. It expired today.
I was so startled and in such a hurry, that I took the coupon from his outstretched hand, said a quick thanks and hustled along.
Several hours later, I’m still thinking about it. I’m wishing I had taken a few more seconds to really look that man in the eyes and say thank you. Because he didn’t have to do that. He didn’t have to give that coupon away. It was worthless to him. Just a piece of paper. And yet, knowing that it would have value for someone else, he took the time and the effort to find someone who could use it.
Sure, he didn’t walk miles in the snow. He was already at the store and the paper was already in his pocket. But he made a conscious decision to help a stranger, instead of throwing that small slip of paper in the trash.
No, he didn’t have to give that coupon away. But in the process of making that small decision, he made somebody’s day brighter. And today, it was my day.
I feel so often, that time just rushes by, that people are a blur as they race about, eyes on the future, and none of us really take the time to notice or appreciate the moment we’re in. Then, like a spot light, a span of seconds is illuminated. I find my gaze fixated, my attention and my heart unwilling to let go. Time screeches to a halt and a moment becomes infinite. I snap out of the frenzied fast lane and remember that this is the kind of feeling I want to cultivate for the entirety of my life. To allow one moment to be the only thing that’s important, until the next moment arrives.
I don’t need to be in a race to finish something, just to have something as equally urgent take it’s place. My life does not need to be defined by the quantity of experiences, but by the quality. So often I forget this resolution, this life manifesto that I have adopted as my own, because society is constantly telling me I’m wrong for thinking so and brainwashing me back to the party line.
So, every time I get the reminder that it’s worthwhile to take a deep breath and stop trying to break the sound barrier, I am grateful to the catalyst.
I renew my intention to take time, slowly, and enjoy things for what they are in the present. To form connections, however fleeting. To treat each moment, as all the time in the world. To take joy in the little things. And every time I succeed, it is a small triumph. And every time I fail, it is an opportunity to learn from my mistakes and do better next time.
So, thank you again kind man, for the reminder of the goodness of people, the eternity of a moment, the strength of an open heart and open eyes, and the power of a small decision. Also, the coupon was really great."

Effie's Psych
Twitter,
Blogger,
and Tumblr.
-->